Speaking Life Into Yourself

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How do you talk to yourself?  Do you encourage yourself or do you tear yourself down?  We can either bring life to ourselves or death.  You are what you think of yourself.  This goes with how we speak to others, also.  I have seen people talk themselves into sickness because they said it enough that they believed it.  I have also seen people change what they believe about themselves because of the life that someone else spoke into them.  Words are EXTREMELY powerful.  We also plant seeds that we may not see immediately.  So, even when you speak to strangers, what seeds are you planting that will come to fruition later?

Scripture is very clear about our words and the power that they have.

Proverbs 18:21 (NIV)- The tongue has the power of life and death,and those who love it will eat its fruit.

Isaiah 55:11 (NLT)- It is the same with my word.  I send it out, and it always produces fruit.  It will accomplish all I want it to, and it will prosper everywhere I send it.

Epehsians 4:29 (NLT)- Don’t use foul or abusive language.  Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.

Colossians 4:6 (NIV)- Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.

It all starts with changing our thought patterns.  My favorite, and I have used it before for an earlier post, is Ephesians 4:23.  It says, Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes.  We have to change how we think if we want our words to change.  I have to admit that I struggle with speaking life into myself…especially when things are not going right.  Yet, I have gotten a lot better at how long I berate myself with negatives.  What I have found is that if I am continuously speaking truth into myself on a daily basis, then those moments where I feel like I’m garbage and I want to tell myself off, are less and less frequent.

Words bring life.  The best example of this is the Valley of Dry Bones.

Ezekiel 37:1-14 (NLT)- The lord took hold of me, and I was carried away by the Spirit of the Lord to a valley filled with bones.  He led me all around among the bones that covered the valley floor.  They were scattered everywhere across the ground and were completely dired out.  Then he asked me, “Son of man, can these bones become living again?”  “O Sovereign Lord,” I replied, “you alone know the answer to that.”  Then he said to me, “Speak a prophetic message to these bones and say, ‘Dry bones, listen to the word of the Lord!  This is what the Sovereign Lord says: Look! I am going to put breath into you and make you live again!  I will put flesh and muscles on you and cover you with skin. I will put breath into you, and you will come to life. Then you will know that I am the Lord.’”  So I spoke this message, just as he told me. Suddenly as I spoke, there was a rattling noise all across the valley. The bones of each body came together and attached themselves as complete skeletons.  Then as I watched, muscles and flesh formed over the bones. Then skin formed to cover their bodies, but they still had no breath in them.  Then he said to me, “Speak a prophetic message to the winds, son of man. Speak a prophetic message and say, ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord says: Come, O breath, from the four winds! Breathe into these dead bodies so they may live again.’”  So I spoke the message as he commanded me, and breath came into their bodies. They all came to life and stood up on their feet—a great army.  Then he said to me, “Son of man, these bones represent the people of Israel. They are saying, ‘We have become old, dry bones—all hope is gone. Our nation is finished.’  Therefore, prophesy to them and say, ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord says: O my people, I will open your graves of exile and cause you to rise again. Then I will bring you back to the land of Israel.  When this happens, O my people, you will know that I am the Lord.  I will put my Spirit in you, and you will live again and return home to your own land. Then you will know that I, the Lord, have spoken, and I have done what I said. Yes, the Lord has spoken!’”

What are you speaking into yourself?  Life or death?

=) Be Blessed!

The Chance To Start Fresh

Ahh…a new year!  It so refreshing!  I haven’t even bothered writing for awhile since every time I thought I was getting better, I came down with it all over again…and am still trying to get over the “Tennessee Crud” as so I have heard it so eloquiently called.  Needless to say, I have not exercised since September, BUT, I haven’t gained anything!  Even with going through the holidays, I still managed to lose.  Which really does tell me that the issue I’ve had was completely my thyroid.  Such hope this does bring…Sorry…had to Yoda for a second.

New Years has came and everyone is abuzz with their resolutions.  We don’t do them in our house.  I feel like they set you up for failure.  They make you focus too much on what you don’t like about yourself or your life, which isn’t productive. Now, setting goals is another matter.  We haven’t sat down yet and set our family goals, but I have set my personal ones.

  1. Get back on track with walking
  2. Register & complete a 5K
  3. Buckle down and learn Korean (not just sporadic words)
  4. Plant my garden and actually tend to it
  5. Try to put up/can 50% of our food supply
  6. Read the Bible completely through
  7. Read more books
  8. Focus on getting our side business off the ground
  9. Prioritize my time better

I think that’s enough to get me started.  Granted, I have ones that require the help of the hubs, so we’ll just categorize those as family goals.  Anyway you look at it, it’s going to be a great year.

I have already printed my new forms for my Household Notebook and Budget Binder.  I’m working on getting that put back together and organized.  This year though, I am going to get to make a new binder for all the projects for the house we are going/wanting to be working on.  We have a lot of change that will be happening over the next couple of years that will require a lot of planning and budgeting.  One huge thing is Destiny will be graduating this year…not sure if it will be in May or December, but it will be happening.  It’s crazy to think about, but I love new seasons!

So, what are the goals that you have set for this year?  I would love to hear about them!  Be Blessed!  =)

 

The Start of A New Venture

As most of you know, I’m a SAHM.  I went back to work in 2013 at a gas station and I worked 3rd shift for a year.  It was tough on my family since I did nothing but sleep all day and was not mentally present when I was awake since I was always exhausted.  I struggled toward the end with whether it was the right decision to keep working or not.  Needless to say, I got my answer.  I am back at home and every time I have talked about going back to work, Hunter melts down.  It creates too much change in our house for me not to be here and managing things.  So, what can I do?  I need to do something.

I’ve have been praying for awhile now about what the answer would be and I could never get peace about me going back to work outside of the home. Well, Tevis works at a place where he has access to discarded furniture. Every so often he would call me and say, “Hey!  There is this _____.  Do you think we could use it?”  I didn’t pick up on it then, but over the last few months it started dawning on me that maybe we could just start repurposing these things.

He brought home this coffee table one day.  It has sat in our basement for a few weeks while I tried to figure out exactly what I wanted to do with it.  I decided on a bench.  Pinterest is a handy little tool!

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I went to Hancock Fabric and found a piece of upholstery that was 90% off AND I got to use a 15% off coupon, too!  Then we went to Michael’s and bought some black spray paint and got to use a 50% off coupon for it.  And we were ready to go!  Oh, forgot to mention that the padding for it, Tevis got from work too.  We were able to put a memory foam seat on it!  Sweet!

First things first…Time to dismantle the thing!

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Next, we had to measure and cut the padding for the seat cushion.  We used a thin piece of regular foam for the bottom and then memory foam for the top.

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After cutting the pieces to size, we sprayed an adhesive glue to the table top, just to hold it in place while we maneuvered it around.  Tevis lined up the pieces of foam on the material before we placed the top down.

Then, as Tevis pulled the material taut, I stapled it down.  He made sure that it was just taut enough to where it didn’t dimple the fabric around the edges.  We started on the short sides, then the long sides, leaving the corners for last.  We gathered the corners together and then stapled them down after we got it shaped in a way we liked.

Now, we get to paint!  We tried to get it done in one day, but we just couldn’t see since it had gotten dark and we noticed that the paint wasn’t liking the finish on the wood.  Tevis took it all to the shed and sanded it a little to give the paint something to adhere to.  I ended up having to finish the painting the next day in the basement since the temperature was too cold outside for the paint.

Once everything was dry, it was time for the fun part!  Putting it back together and seeing how it turned out!

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And then….TADA!!!

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It turned out great!  It wasn’t that hard to do.  It was a fun project and we will definitely be doing it again.  I just have to keep reminding myself that I can’t keep everything!  HA!

Tevis called the next day and said that he had found a dresser and head & footboard.  The dresser was not salvageable but the drawers were.  Now I have drawers in my basement and I can’t wait to show you what I plan to do with those!  As far as the headboard and footboard goes…it may end up as another bench.  Who knows!  I think I’m going to like this new adventure and I think I understand why I’ve not been given a “yes” about going back to work.  Is it going to be a huge income producer?  No, but it will supplement the same, if not more, that I would be making it I did go back to work.  And, I get to stay home and take care of my family still.  I think it’s a win all the way around.  =)  Be Blessed!

 

Hello. Who Are You Again?

Hi!  I feel like I should reintroduce myself since I manged to fall off the face of the earth.  Actually, after my last post (of being on the mend), I ended up getting more sick.  The pneumonia came back full force, only this time in both lungs.  Needless to say, I was dead to the world and writing was the farthest thing from my mind.  So, I have no new update for you except that I did continue to lose.  I just don’t know exactly how much since I’m still coming off of the steroid that the doctor had me on.

Life still continued to go on while I was busy making sure the couch didn’t float away.  We were really worried about that happening, so I felt like it was my duty to prevent it.  I am happy to report that the couch is in fact still sitting in my living room.  While, I was securing it to the floor, Tevis (being the wonderful man that he is) painted the living room.  Finally, we are starting to update the house.  It was going to be “our” project, but I offered moral support (from the couch, of course).

A couple days ago was our 17th wedding anniversary.  It’s so funny to sit and stare at him and think about us.  We have this joke about how I stalked him.  In high school, I worked at Taco Bell.  So did a friend of mine (Derrick) who wasn’t allowed to work on Wednesdays or Sundays because of church.  One Wednesday night, after church, Derrick and a friend came in to get something to eat.  He asked me if he could bum a couple cigarettes and while he was filling his drink, I went to the break-room to get my cigarette pack.  When I came back, Derrick’s friend was standing there at the counter.  I handed him the cigarettes, he turned and walked away, saying nothing at all to me.  (We have long since quit smoking.)

The next day, Derrick and I were sitting in the break-room, getting ready to clock-in.  I said, “Derrick, I don’t know who that guy is that you brought in with you last night, but I’m going to marry him!”  He said, “Who?  Tevis?” “Is that the guy with the long hair and ripped jeans?  Yes!  Him.”  Derrick just laughed at me.  That’s when I made sure that I was wherever Tevis was.  I started going to his youth group.  Started drinking Dr. Pepper (YUCK!).  Started going with the crew after youth to wherever it was that they went to eat.  Yet, he would never talk.  Or I would only get one word answers (he’s an introvert).  This went on for months.

Spring Break came and for some strange reason we had 3 feet of snow…IN MARCH!  I got the nerve up to call him and see if I could come over. Southern Indiana doesn’t do well with a lot of snow, but I was willing to risk it to be able to pursue the man I was going to marry.  Whatever it took! I made it to his house, his parents were gone to the grocery and I had to park at the end of the driveway because of all the snow.  I made it into the house and for 3 hours all we did was sit and watch TV…in silence.  Not one word was said….oh and I had to pee.  Really?  Now?  There is NO WAY that I’m going to let him know that!  Finally, I gave in and asked where the bathroom was.

His parents came home and were shocked that he had a girl over.  I was the only one he had ever had over.  I stayed a little while longer and then headed home, feeling like this was a complete disaster.  Especially since the only talking done was me asking for a potty!

After that, we started talking every night on the phone.  I forgot to mention that he lived in a different county and went to a different school, so it took effort to stalk him.  We learned a lot about each other and in May (22nd to be exact) while I was getting ready for Youth and talking to him on the phone, I finally mustered the courage to ask him to go out with me.  He said yes.  Though years later, I asked him why he said yes, and he told me that it was because he hadn’t had a girlfriend in a while…sure whatever.  It didn’t matter, because 3 years later (almost exactly), I married him!  Who’s laughing now!  HA!

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Yep, I love him!

We are buddies.  I like him.  He’s fun.  Sure we fight, but we can cut up and hang out and just have fun together like 2 friends…but we have benefits.  I laugh at people who say love at first sight isn’t real.  Was it love?  No.  Was I twitterpated?  Yes!  Real love changes and evolves and deepens with time.  But, I knew.  I knew the minute I saw him.  I knew he was the one and nobody was going to tell me any different.

Every time Destiny has talked to me about a crush she has had, I have always asked her 3 questions.

  1. Can you see yourself married to him?
  2. Can you see the man that he is?
  3. Can you see the man that he can/will be (with age and maturity)?

She has never been able to answer those questions until last year.  Its been awesome to watch her and Sam’s relationship develop and to see the foundation that they are building.  They’re relationship has mirrored our relationship so much (timeline-wise) it’s scary.  But, she knew.  She knew he was it and nobody was going to tell her any different, either…wonder why she’s so headstrong?!?

Anyway,  Tevis is amazing and sexy and loving.  We’ve been to hell and back together.  Still, he stood there.  Strong and tall.  I adore him.  He’s became the man that I saw in him 20 years ago.  He is my Mr. Steady.  He loves me.  All of me.  Even the ugly side of me.  That takes courage on his part, because I can be pretty mean when I’m upset.  He keeps me grounded, yet lets me fly.  He’s my rocker…even though he won’t grow his hair back out.  I.Love.Him.  And nothing is going to change that.  =)  Be Blessed!

My Journey To Health…Weekly Update 14 &15 (I’m On The Mend)

I know, I know.  I didn’t post last week.  I promise I have a valid reason.  A month ago I developed a cough that progressively got worse.  I’ve just been really sick and I can honestly say, I haven’t been this sick in a LONG time.  Two weeks ago I finally called the doctor.  Come to find out I had a wonderfully established case of bronchitis, pneumonia in my left lung and starting in my right, and sinusitis.  He put me on an antibiotic, breathing treatments, and a steroid (forget weighing in).  After a few days, I wasn’t really getting any better and the cough had gotten worse.  I ended up catching something else too and Thursday night I was hit with chills and a fever and did nothing but cough my head off for the next 3 days (mainly at night).  We’re thinking that Tevis might have brought something home and since I was already weak, I picked it up.  But, I’m finally on the mend (I believe).  I still have a cough, but it’s nothing like it was.  Can’t talk a whole lot cause it triggers it, but I’m hoping that gets better over the next few days.

Anyway, I haven’t even bothered with weighing or measuring and honestly the only workout I have been able to do is cough (which I am counting!)  You use a TON of muscles when you do that and if they are sore, then it’s been a good workout!  At least that’s what I’m claiming.

So I haven’t given up or quit.  Just had a little detour.  Just say a little prayer for me to really kick this.  I missed church for the last 2 weeks and I’m not singing this week either because I can’t even really talk without coughing much less sing.  Even though I have nothing really to report, I still want to leave you with a bit of encouragement,.

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Sometimes we get so caught up in what we can see happening or not and we want things to happen fast.  Why do you think that we have all these fad diets and diet pills that can make you look like a bikini model in 2 days?!?  Every day.  Every single day we are getting better.  Every step is one step closer.  Just keep striving.  You’ll get there.  Even with the little detours on the path.  =)  Be Blessed!

My Journey To Health…Week 13 Update (He’s Our Daddy!)

Last week I was busy having a pity party for myself.  Figured out that the UGH feeling was coming from me incorporating sweet tea back into my diet.  I don’t drink it regularly and it’s always a half-cut, but when I am out running errands and…well you know how Walmart makes you thirsty.  Anyway, I’ve said it before.  I CAN’T HAVE SUGAR.  Even if I cut down on it.  That eliminates 99.99999% of all food on the market (not including fresh veg and fruits).  No wonder people are always sick.  Sugar is legal crack!  Keep them addicted, keep getting their money.  Stop poisoning our people!  *Jumps off soapbox*

Anyway, I was saying how I felt trapped by not being able to sway even the slightest amount from eating better.  I had a good friend who reminded me that I need to be reminding myself of “who my daddy was” when I feel trapped.  She sent me this video:

I remember back when I started this I had said that the majority of this journey was going to be mental.  I am at the mental part.  The beginning was adrenalin.  Now is where the rubber hits the road. Great things never come from comfort zones!  Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results.  To have permanent change, I must have REAL change.  Not just physically, but mentally.  Ephesians 4:23 says, Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes.

I’m a thinker and I tend to mull things over and over and over and over and…well, you get the point.  I lose sleep over my brain. Mentally is exactly where satan is going to attack me.  It reminds me of when Professor Snape is training Harry Potter to be strong mentally so that Voldermort can’t get into his thoughts.  “Control your emotions.  Descipline your mind.”  I’m including that scene in case you want to watch.

I need a strong mind.  I need to keep going but not on my strength alone.  I have to say that I think I’ve been trying to do a lot of this on my own.  Everyday I need to get up and put on a conjoined twin jacket and take another step.  I can’t successfully go where God isn’t. So often it isn’t he that has moved but I.  My road is extremely winding and hilly.  I can see Him walking on the easier path and I, like an ADD child, just going “oh look a butterfly!” or “Oh look a squirrel” and running off.  And all the while he is still just walking straight, yet he slows his pace to be able to be exactly where he needs to be when I return onto the His path.  We are never really adults.  We are just bigger kids.  Still learning.  Still exploring.  Still thinking that we know it all.  When in reality, we are still just His children whom he is trying to protect and guide and to train up for the battle ahead.

So, I say all that to really say this.  Yes, I had a bad week.  Yes, I have had a few bad weeks.  I can’t let that be the end all.  In reality all it is is just an ADD moment on my path.  But it is in those moments that Satan can (and will) jump into your head and fill it with all kinds of junk and play with your emotions and torment you with you fears.  We have to block him.  We have to fill our minds with the truths of God and what He says we are.  We have to walk in the truth of WHO HE IS!  That He’s our daddy!  And so often we really don’t know who He is because we haven’t taken the time to REALLY know Him.  He needs to become our conjoined twin.  Why do we make that so hard?  Stop paying attention to the shiny object that’s being dangled in front of you as a distraction and start paying attention to the rock that you are.  Take the time to let God polish and shine and tenderly care for it and you will turn into a true gem.  =)  Be Blessed!

PS- I know I was just all over the map there, but I need to tell you my updates.  I did lose poundage but no inches.  So, it’s still a win.  So I am down 43 lbs since the end of July.  =)

New Starting Weight: 342

Est. Heaviest: 365

Current Weight: 322

Total inches lost: 34