Control of The Help Meet

I started a reading plan today to read through the whole Bible in a year.  I’ve been being purposeful in making sure that I get adequate time in the Word and to really press in to what God is wanting to teach me.  This has been a real test of self-control and structure for me.  I’m a fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants type of gal.  I like the spontaneous, yet, I love to have routine and structure.  It’s a total paradox.  Anywho…this morning I was reading in Genesis.  I wasn’t really expecting anything to take my breath away since it’s the beginning of Genesis.  I mean, come on.  We know the story.  God made the earth and everything in it.  Then made man.  Then made for him a helper.  Then the helper screwed up and aided man to fall into sin.  He blamed her.  She blamed the snake.  (WOW does any of THAT sound familiar???  The passing of the buck.)  Then God told the snake he was a pain in the butt.  Then God started on the woman and it hit me like a ton of bricks.  Something I had NEVER noticed before…

Genesis 3:16.  Bam!  Plain and simple.  Then He said to the woman, “I will sharpen the pain of your pregnancy, and in pain you will give birth.  AND YOU WILL DESIRE TO CONTROL YOUR HUSBAND, but he will rule over you.”  Read that again.  And again.  One more time.

I was a director for women’s ministry for about 3 years.  We studied the P31 woman for a year and ended with a conference focusing on her.  It was a great year.  We learned a lot about her and her productiveness, self-control and all her other great attributes.  Over this past year, I have been studying and really learning all I can about being the help meet that God has called me to be and what it means to truly be a help meet.  The most common underlying theme that I keep finding is our need to submit to the authority of our husbands.  We, as managers of our home, seem to have an issue with this.  We want to be in control whether we realize it or not.  That is NOT how God ordered things to be.  We are not the leaders of the family, we are the nurturers.  Why do you think that women can multitask and men can’t (or struggle with it)?  They function from one “bucket” at a time.  We as their help meet “manage” everything else around them (kids, bills, cooking, etc) to HELP them to have more time to focus on what THEY are called to do.  If your husband feels like a hero at home, he will feel like a hero out in the world.  He will function much better and be more productive.  If your husband feel like a failure at home, he will feel like a failure in the world.

Look at the Feminist Movement.  What was it all about?  Equality?  Problem is we were NOT created equal.  God created us to fill the role He designed us to fill.  To fill in where our spouses are weak and vice verse.  It makes so much sense now as to why we struggle with wanting to be in control so much.  It was part of our punishment for sin.  The Bible is very clear in what our roles as women, wives & mothers are to be.  We have gotten way off track from that.  The family unit, in this day and age, is functioning from a place not ordered by God.  We as women need to step down off our high horses and let our men lead the way God designed them to.  We need to be teaching younger women how to be the women God designed us to be.  Titus 3:3-5 says, Similarly, teach the older women to live in a way that honors God.  They must not slander others or be heavy drinkers.  Instead, they should teach others what is good.  These older women MUST TRAIN THE YOUNGER WOMEN to love their husbands and their children, to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes, to do good and to be submissive to their husbands.  Then they will not bring shame on the word of God.  We are not doing this and that needs to change.  That change starts at home with our daughters.  Train them up.

Same goes for the men.  Men are to be raising up younger men to know how to love and lead their families.  Titus goes on to say in 3:6-8, In the same way, encourage the young men to live wisely.  And you yourself must be an example to them by doing good works of every kind.  Let everything you do reflect the integrity and seriousness of your teaching.  teach the truth so that your teaching can’t be criticized.  Then those who oppose us will be ashamed and have nothing bad to say about us.

I have a challenge for you.  For the next 2 weeks, let your husband lead in all areas.  Ask him what he wants to do about decisions that need to be made.  Let him call the shots.  Submit to his authority and see what the result is.  Remember it’s not about trust, it’s about obedience.  Let go of the control.  If you don’t know what area you are controlling in, pray about it and ask God to reveal it to you.  Father, right now I lift these women up to you.  You know their struggles.  You know their needs.  We pray for revelation.  Reveal to them where they can serve their husbands better.  Restore Godly order within our homes.  We praise you for the grace you give us.  Help us to extend that grace to our families.  Amen.  =)  Be Blessed!



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